Kana

My daughter, how I miss you so. I haven't seen you in over 2 months. I dream about you, think about you, imagine about you all the time. My heart is filled with sorrow, my eyes filled with many tears. I am beginning to forget what you look like. I have to look at photos to remember your features. My heart is in pain. I love you so much. I wish you would see us. Let us love you as we are your family. I don't want to be out of your life. I want to be close to you as we once were. You Daddy can't hardly make it each day. He prays and cries out to God for hope.

We love you Kana and hope that God will heal us all in some way.

Lindsay - Kick Return of the Ball....
Go Lazer!

Another Corner Kick - Lindsay

Here it comes - Lindsay

Corner Kick - Lindsay

Lindsay - #22

Lindsay - WS Twins 2009

Photo of Lindsay playing for WS Twins. I am proud of her.
Can't say more!

Fun Fishing

Let me introduce my grandson Isaac. He is 2 years old and is such a delight to be with. I didn't think I could ever love anyone, anymore than I loved my children....was I wrong! His bright smile brings me such love....such rejoicing....and such emotion. In this photo, we took him fishing...his first real time...holding the pole.....oh Isaac, I love you.

"THE LAZER"

Big Boot!!!!

POP IT BABY!!!

PUT YOUR FOOT ON IT!!!

DID IT GO IN??

"The Lazer" is a sweet, blonde haired, blue eyed doll. She is the delight of my whole entire world. I love her more than I can pen in here on this blog, or even speak. I enjoy every moment in my baby girl's life. I only wish we could go back to the more "fun" days. I remember so much our lovely times just lying around in the bed together talking about the stars on the ceiling or the things we were going to do later. Her daddy, me and that doll baby laying there between us....just us. No worries, no problems. Baby doll, I am enjoying your life.....watching you grow into a young lady, but I can't help and wish we were back to our days of young and your were there in your little pigtails.....ponytails.....and those beautiful blue eyes staring out in wonder. I love you LAZER!!!!

What's up?

If you are wondering what is up....Mickey wants to know also. I saw on TV this morning that prices are going up at Disney. Well...look at Mickey above, does it look like he cares?? He don't and neither do I! I can't afford to go...never will be able to anyway. Glad to know Mickey don't care either!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks Mickey!!!!

To Know Me, Is To Love Me

If you ever got the chance to know this little character, you'd know someone special. He is my grandson, Isaac James. He is 17 months old now....and just as sweet and special as he was the day he was born. He is one curious little bug. You can't keep his hands out of anything. He is into all he can get into. We have such fun times with him....and I steal as much lovin' as possible....all he will grant me. He will always be special to me. "ALWAYS!"

How Do You???

How do you pick up your life and piece it back together after you lose everything? I wish someone would show me. I am so scared. It is going to happen, I just know it is. It could be anytime - anytime. I know some people care, some don't. I want to survive. I have always tried to do right by my bills and pay them as I could. It don't look like I am going to be able to save my home. I've fought my last fight. I give up. I don't know how to start over....I just don't. I only worry about my children at home. What will it be like for them? My babies.....sad.

Let God

Something I need to share......

Whenever you feel stressed....depressed....

Let Go & Let God

Handle it!!!

"Granny & Isaac"

This is Granny...and Isaac. Granny is Isaac's Great Grandmother. He has grown. Isaac is 13 weeks old here in this photo which was taken on 6/16/2007. We took him with us to eat to celebrate Father's Day. It was fun and he was awake the biggest part of the night. He spent the night with me that night and went to church with us too. Everyone asks about him. He is a special doll given to us by God...and we are grateful for him. Little Isaac James...you are so loved!!!

~Me, Being a Nana~

Being a Nana is special. I enjoy each and every day I get to see my grandson Isaac.
I love him so much. Someone asked me one day, "What's it like being a grandmother?"
I have to say...it is wonderful. I love you Isaac James!!

Nana & Pappa with Isaac James

"Pappa"

Shane likes being Isaac's Pappa. He enjoys sitting and watching him snooze or talking to him while he is cooing back. He loves his little grandson Isaac. He can't wait for him to be up and running around the house, playing ball, and doing all the little boy things they do. He says it will be a pleasure to play with him....as it is now. Isaac is "Pappa's Boy".

Death can be Scary

This is my precious Grandma Goins/with my uncle Doug.

From Left to Right....my mother, Mary...her sister Pansy ....and her sister Carol .

I created a book with photos of my Grandma Goins and gave it to my mother for Mother's Day.

Sometimes life is sad. I experienced death at a young age with my Grandpa Easter dying while I was 7 years old. It was a horrible experience but I survived it. I mean really while I was old enough to understand, I still was tramatized by the realization that they are dead...no coming back. Scary?? Yes, very much so for a small child. What I brought away from that though has brought me to where I am now in this life. Yes, everyone dies.....but you can choose to die and go to 2 places....Heaven or Hell. I am sad that my Grandma Goins passed away and it was too quick for me....but it was even quicker to say good-bye to all those who had gone before ....Grandpa Easter, Grandpa Goins, Grandma Easter, Paw-Paw Castevens, Paw-Paw Richmond, Jamie....who didn't even get the chance to live life...have children....and such. They all died way too early. I know one day I will see those who made that choice and where they are ...and it will be a wonderful reunion. I see Heaven as such beauty and as a mystery...and frankly, I can't wait to meet Jesus..............YEA!

Lindsay-My Blue-eyed Baby Doll

My blue-eyed baby doll is Lindsay.

She is one tough cookie.

I am so, so very proud of her.

She wrote me a letter last night and

told me she loves me. It was special

to me. I keep things that she does, as I did

with all my children. And I love my children,

but Lindsay came along at a special time in

our lives. She was very much wanted by

her Daddy, me, Kana and Kasey.

We showered her with love and kisses, and

we still do when she will let us.

Lindsay Beautiful!!!

I May Look Worn and Tattered......

Ever had one of these days?? I feel like this almost every day lately. I can't get my body off and running. I look like I have been pulled through the mud every day. It is killing me. I can hardly cope with today's problems and pressures. I feel like I am on the road 24/7. Lindsay plays travel soccer so that takes up a lot of time with play and practice. Then there is the every day problems around the house. A tree blew down at our house during the 60MPH winds and ripped up the sewer lines. It is driving me mad. We can't fix it due to the health department regulations, and our next door neighbors well isn't 50 feet away. Ain't that a crazy reason to let your sewage run into the neighbors yard??? I guess....CRAZY. Then I get no sleep. I am so sleepy today. My cat had kittens and insists on bringing them in the house. She won't take no for my answer. My sister is driving me mad today about a household shower for my oldest daughter...and I can't do it now. Not only is it a cost problem, but it takes the time I do not have now. I just simply can not do it. Shane looks like death warmed over. He is so tired. I felt sorry for him in the last few days. He looks like he can't go another mile. He is worn out too. One positive.....

I love my grandson Isaac James and he has brought a new light into our lives....he is adorable. He is bringing me some joy I haven't had in a long time. I love to hear him breathe, cry, grunt ...which he does a lot of. So I may look worn and tattered....I may feel down and discouraged.....I may seem raggedy, but thank you God for one more day here on this earth to enjoy the time I have with my baby Lindsay, Kana, Kasey, Isaac James and mostly with my husband Shane...the love of my life.